Lest we forget... (or do whatever works to get you through the day/night before 3 months old)

I've received several emails in the last month about short nap cycles. The questions revolve around 3 things:
1. Is it normal for naps to be SO SHORT (for example, 30 - 45 min) at around 2-4 months?
2. Is it ok to help make naps longer by [enter whatever means the mother has finally found to put her child to sleep and keep him that way for more than 10 min]?
3. How do I lengthen naps?

For once, I thought I'd be a little more succinct. My answer to 1 and 2 is: YES!  Babies before 6 months or so often wake up from naps very quickly, corresponding to their short sleep cycles. To answer #3: Oftentimes you can get them BACK to sleep, with some help from one contraption or another (swings, bouncy/buzzy chairs, slings, stroller, carseat -- in or out of the car, breasts, bottles).

There are far too many books out there telling you NOT to use these "sleep crutches" because babies will get used to them and NEVER. EVER. EVER. SLEEP. ON. THEIR. OWN. I come from another perspective. Because most babies' nap cycles don't lengthen until about 6 months (and they often do so with no intervention on your part), trying to eek out a nice long nap from your infant warrants any arsenal out there. I went back through some very badly filmed clips of my many attempts at getting my boys to nap during this early stage, just to remember how crazy hard it was to put these little guys to sleep and keep them that way. As you can see, I used any strategy (and many more not filmed). Swings, bouncy chairs, slings and nursing... all for the elusive 1 - 2  hour nap. They never napped that long in one stretch until they were 5 months old or so. And after about 6.5 months, they were slowly weaned off all swings and such.

So, my bottom line based, in part, on my very unscientific sample of 2: In the first 3 months or so, I would use any means necessary to get your child to nap and stay that way for more than 15 min. I did...  (Please excuse the quality of the film. Oh, and the CHEESY, high-pitched squeaking with which I spoke with the camera/babies. My only excuse was SEVERE sleep deprivation).
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Comments

[Christy]

My son was a half-hour napper. Oh how I thought I was doing something wrong. And he always, always woke up crying, which many Moms were happy to tell me meant my poor darling wasn't getting enough sleep.

I think he went to 45 minutes somewhere in the first year, then an hour around one. Now he's 2 and sleeping anywhere from 1-2 hours. It's nothing I did, just what he's come to on his own.

Those early months, the thing I found helped us the most was a moby carrier. He liked to be snuggled close to me and would take his best naps that way. It stopped working around 15 weeks, so I transitioned him to his crib. I agonized over it at the time but I recall it going pretty smoothly. They're changing so much then, I think the advice to do whatever works is such great advice.

[K]

My son napped for 40 minutes maximum until he was 7 months old. He also refused to sleep anywhere but on a body (either in arms on the rocking chair or in the moby, ergo or bijorn) until he was 6 months old.

Out of nowhere at 7 months his naps started stretching to an hour, then an hour and a half, then sometimes two hours and now at 9 months old we frequently have to wake him up from his naps otherwise he won't be tired for bedtime.

I totally agree with Isabel. Get through the first few months (6 was the magic number for us) by any means possible.

[Emily]

Eh, this is SO us! My son has been a 45-minute napper literally since birth. I've never known another newborn to sleep so little! He's now almost 5.5 months, and we've gotten a few longer naps out of him in the past few weeks. It's almost always the morning one, but two times we've gotten longer afternoon naps. (about an hour and a half) My daughter was the same way, I want to say she was actually closer to 9 months before her morning nap started predictably lengthening, so we had a LONG time of catnaps! I'm praying my son starts doing earlier than that!

[E. A.]

Isabel, I'm just going to say it--I live for your blog!! Somehow you always address the issues that we're facing at home. Our daughter is nearly 5 months old, and naps range anywhere between 25 and 45 minutes. I am thrilled to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and she won't be a 'short napper' for life as some books have tried to brand her.

[Isabela]

@E.A.: GAH! I live for this kind of response! SO glad the blog is helping.

[Theresa]

Yes, I agree that this blog is wonderful and a great encouragment. Even though my third child (3 months) is my third cat napper, it's encouraging to be reminded that it will get better with time and that I am not the only one out there with a baby who won't stay asleep. Christy, I too often feel like I am doing something wrong as a mother when my friends' babies enjoy long leisurely naps. I am hoping that by 6 months we will be doing better, since that was the magic number with my older girls as well. What always got us through, and what is still getting is through the days is one good long nap in the swing every day!

[Miranda Bridgewater]

THANK YOU! THANK YOU ALL! i'd been blaming myself for her not staying down during the day. And in some cases spent the whole day trying to get her to sleep. Your comments and the blog have helped this first time mom immeasurably.